The things I would say.

Do you ever wonder, if you died today would your loved ones truly know how you felt about them?

-Now, im not saying I do. Yet again im not saying that I ever implied that I did, lost yet?
With the way the world is today you just honestly never know and the most important thing, You never know when God needs you to come home.

-So if I were to pass away tomorrow, 7 months from now or 36 years from now I have hope that on the off chance one of my loved ones were browsing here they would stumble across my blog and just see exactly what they meant to me.

-So have you guessed it yet? I bet you have, but if not..im going to write what my loved ones mean to me and what I would want them to know if I would happen to pass away before they do.



*Momma- Oh where to start, you are SUCH a STRONG and BEAUTIFUL lady! You have everything you need to succeed and you dont need ANYONE to help you to get there. You are my role model and have taught me more than you will ever know. Lauren Alaina said it best when she said "Like my mother does", and as you know. That is my song to you. It describes us to a tee. You have never left my side through best (fake) friends, boyfriends, tears, bosses and everything else in between you have been there to wipe away my tears, pull me back to my feet, kiss my cheek and help me press foward. Not only have you been there for me in those areas but have also helped to keep me in check with God. You are willing to hear me out and help me. We also have this cool thing where sometimes, just sometimes, I give you a little advice and help you on your journey with him as well. I carry you in my heart where ever I am or go, on every journey, every night I lay down to close my eyes I thank God that he gave me you Mom as mine! With good things however comes bad too, and heres some things I want to apologize for so that you know. Im sorry for lying to you about things I should have been just truthful with, im sorry for ever saying hurtful things to you in a rage of anger, im sorry for ever making you cry or making you feel worthless. IM JUST SORRY. Hurting you was never my intentions in any situation and im sorry. I love you so much Mom and this word document, or excuse me, BLOG POST couldnt ever explain it all. You know in your heart how much you mean to me and how much I love you. I would lay down and DIE FOR YOU anyday, anytime and anywhere. Your my rock mom. Im glad your mine too!
---I love you with all of my heart Mom




*Dad- Welllll Dad you know we have fought more times than I can count on all ten fingers and toes!! Yet I still love you just as much!I have enjoyed growing up in softball and truly finding my passion for it! *Crusher* I have always loved it and you being my coach added to it! As well as us coaching Upward basketball together, thats fun! Well Dad thanks for all the things you have taught me and all the things that you continue to teach me. You have always been there for us and havent ever let us down. Just work on that temper ;) but I have it to so I cant say to to much! Take care of Mom and love her unconditionally, shes so strong and beautiful. I know you see that too. Dont let her grieve or get down. I love you Dad and you have always had a big role to me whether you have known it or not. Sorry if I frustrated you with Bry, but I love him more than I have ever thought I could love anyone. Please understand that? You can do great things Dad! Keep pushing foward with everything! AND GO PLAY GOLF MORE! :)
----I love you with all my heart Dad




*Crissy - I love you. You have been my arch enemy, my best friend and everything in between. But mostly you have been my sister. <3 You are beautiful! Dont ever let a man limit you on what you can do or accomplish! STAND UP FOR YOURSELF! God gave you a voice and expects you to use it when someone is not doing right by you. Be the voice to something that needs to be expressed. Ultimatly other than me telling you how much I love you I want you to stand up for yourself more. Stop letting peoples opinions of you, or someones rank or someones PURE OUT JEALOUSY get to you. YOU ARE SOOOO MUCH BETTER THAN THAT! If only you could see that. Be like me and use your voice to say that your not happy about something, or that your over joyed with something or even that your sad and you need someone to help you. Whatever it is USE YOUR VOICE! NO one should ever tear you down without your consent! Remember that and try to work on it! For me? I love you more than I have probably ever made you feel I did. I need to work on that! Im sorry for not going out with you everytime you asked or doing something when you asked. It didnt mean I didnt love you though! Cause I do! Your beautiful sis, and no one can take that away from you! NEVER.! Be strong, be Godly and always use your voice!
---I love you Crissy with all my heart!



*Bryan - Oh geez, where to start. On the day that im typing this, which is January 18th 2012, we have known each other for 3 years going on 4. Let me just say this, my love for you scares the crap out of me sometimes! I find myself thinking of you all the time and wishing I could be with you all hours of the day. You have not always treated me the way you should have treated me. But somehow I managed to trail behind you and pick up all the pieces of my heart, put them back together somehow and keep on loving you. My tolerance with you also makes me so proud of myself too. You can be a GREAT man Bryan, if you will just try. But thats just it, you have to TRY. You cant just expect everything to fall into your lap without you doing any work for it. Cause it wont happen, not at all! I love you so much! I love you like Christ loves the Church. I love you more than I can ever put into words. All those times that I questioned what you were doing, who you were with..it wasnt to make you mad or make you feel like I didnt trust you. It was BECAUSE I LOVED YOU, and I wanted you to see it. I will love you till I part this green earth and I hope that we do spend the rest of our lives together! I really do, because thats how much I love you. But first you have to be faithful and true to me! Bryan do me a favor though, respect your Mother. She loves you so much and just wants to see you succeed! Shes not trying to make you mad or make you feel unwanted, SHES TRYING TO BE YOUR MOM AND TEACH YOU HOW TO DO THE RIGHT THINGS. Listen to her for me, shes wise and has been where you have been. SHE KNOWS WHAT WILL HAPPEN! Dont lie to her either. Just be HONEST! Secondly I want you to spend more time with your brothers, whether you know it or not they look up to YOU! They see what you do and they want to do it too! Set a positive example for them! That DOESNT include spinning tires and driving crazy with them in the car, cursing, smoking and hanging around people you shouldnt. And lastly Bryan, LEAVE WILLIAM AND EVERYONE WHO GOES WITH HIM ALONEEEE!!!!!!! They cause nothing but drama and problems for EVERYONE! Please, for me? Bryan I love you so much, more than you could ever know or comprehend. I will love you forever, I promise.
---I love you with all my heart Bryan Scott!


*Tina- Well again with you Tina, where to start? You have listened to me rant about your son more times than none. Sometimes I feel like you dont always understand or other things but I always turn to you for advice with him. I love you first off and want you to know that you can do anything, overcome anything and get through ANYTHING you want to. You are an awesome mom to the boys and dont let anyone ever tell you different! They are just jealous and rude people if they try to! I want you to know that I love you dearly, no matter what happens between Bryan and I, I will always love you. Thank you for everything, and I truely mean EVERYTHING!
--I love you Tina!